


same story, different lines

by cassleia



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, M/M, major character death in ch 7 only, reduced age gap
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-05
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:40:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 17
Words: 8,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26294284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cassleia/pseuds/cassleia
Summary: There are a million ways to say the same thing, each unfolds a reality all its own.Each chapter stands alone, unless otherwise specified
Relationships: Cassian Andor/Bodhi Rook, Cassian Andor/Jyn Erso, Cassian Andor/Jyn Erso/Leia Organa, Cassian Andor/Leia Organa, Depa Billaba/Obi-Wan Kenobi, Finn/Rey (Star Wars), Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker, Shara Bey/Kes Dameron
Comments: 37
Kudos: 39





	1. Before you go- Cassian/Leia

**Author's Note:**

> Taking notes from @Pontmercyinguntilthecowscomehome 💜
> 
> Inspired by @mottainaiiii's "the way you said I love you" prompt list

Leia watched as he shrugged the jacket back on. He always did, no matter how the seasons changed. It was worn at the edges, and yet she had never known him not to have it. 

He had grown into it, from the young man who it had swamped all those years ago. He had grown into the haunted eyes, those being more and more common as the war raged on around them. 

This was always her least favourite part, and how could it not be? She was simply expected to let him go into the unknown, roll her shoulders and bear the responsibility of making the calls that affected countless lives? 

It wasn't a complaint she would voice. This was her given lot in life, just as his was to follow, but it ate them both alive. Rotting from the inside out, Leia knew what it was like to wait for a comm that never came. 

She was the Princess, the General, the leader who had to ask this of the rest, waiting in the dark for her own turn to come. 

Cassian laced up his boots, the steady movements not betraying any emotion. She almost wished they would, she might feel vindicated in her response if he did. Almost, because she could not wish this on him, could not wish any more pain on him. 

“Leia-”

“Cassi-”

Finally, his face twisted into something other than the blank mask as she grasped at his sleeve. “Don’t,” he pleaded, and though she wished she didn’t, she knew what he was asking of her. Don’t make this more difficult, _don’t ask him to stay. ___

__Leia nodded, still not releasing her grip on the worn jacket. “I love you,” she said. That was enough. It was as if she had said all the rest when the weight of it hung between them._ _

__She didn’t need him to return the sentiment, or, maybe she did, but not enough to ever ask that of him. She knew that he did, and she knew her own worth. She would choose this man a million times over._ _

__Cassian lifted his arm, pulling her hand with it before taking her hand in between his. The contrast sent a shudder through her. He looked her over for a moment, searching for what, she wasn’t quite sure._ _

__Peace, her mind provided, and it wasn’t far off with the intensity of the look, but she couldn’t be the one to provide that. She was looking for ground to stand on just as much._ _

__Cassian kissed her hand, closing his eyes as the warmth spread from that point through her body. He had asked her not to make this more difficult for him, but he wasn’t making it any easier on her heart._ _

__Still, having something to hold as the galaxy grew ever darker would never be something Leia would reject, there were few beauties left in their worlds, this moment, intertwined might be enough to carry them through until the next_ _


	2. In his mind- Cassian/Leia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In between missions Cassian reflects, aided by some Corellian whiskey and a good friend

Cassian’s hand tightened around the glass, a minuscule movement, but with him, that was what had to be read. Cassian told epics in sighs, anthologies in shrugs, and novels in twitches. 

The amber liquid spun in a mesmerizing swirl of loosened lips and momentary lapses, of two men who connected in the breaths between lives. 

Melshi sighed as he leaned back in his seat. He’d known Cassian more than long enough to know when to wait and when to push. “So why are we drinking in here and not out there with the rest?”

Cassian drained the rest of his glass with a wince, reading between the lines _Because I love her, but maker, I wish I didn’t, _his mind offered. “Because you’re better company,” He said instead.__

__Melshi sighed, they were in for a long night. “You don’t mean that.” And he was sure it was true. Cassian wasn’t one to discuss his emotions at length, he kept most people at arm’s length, and this night was unprecedented by all means, but that didn’t change the way he looked at her._ _

__It was a double-edged blade, on one hand, emotion was a risk they all took in times of war, but on the other, without it, what were they left fighting for?_ _

__Melshi was right, even in accordance with what hadn’t been said. And that was the worst part, wasn’t it? That even now he didn’t wish it were different. It washed over him, almost as a revelation in real-time._ _

__“You go out there then, don’t let me keep you.”_ _

__“I need another drink if we’re doing this one, Andor,” Melshi muttered under his breath. He had been prepared to face horrors in this war, but a maudlin Cassian Andor on his bunk wasn’t something one prepared for, “You sure do know how to pick them, Cassian.”_ _

__The Princess of Alderaan, of course. It was fitting, the way they burned bright complementary, but not overpowering. It was tragic as well, two lines that crossed, but never long enough to make the right dent._ _

__Cassian shrugged “You would know, wouldn’t you?” It was a low blow, but not quite crossing the line to cruelty. Simply habit, cutting observations that served him well in other areas bled into personal lives._ _

__What a pair they made. It was no wonder they had drifted together over the years of service, understanding each other on a level only two soldiers could._ _

__Cassian huffed a laugh as Melshi poured them both another glass of whiskey instead of answering. It was nights like these that reminded him that even in the farthest reaches of the galaxy he wasn’t alone._ _

__The burn of the alcohol was almost as welcome of a companion as the man beside him, though it wasn’t quite enough of a distraction from the everpresent thoughts of her._ _

__He would watch from afar, play his part in this everlasting dance. Wishing he didn’t love her. Wishing she loved him. For now, this was enough._ _


	3. As a response- Depa/Obi

Depa hums, the feeling of calm in the middle of a war was rare, but not unheard of. 

Even rarer was reaching into the force and finding _him _. She thinks of Luminara, her old friend now in the far reaches of the galaxy, and what she would say of this. It has been too long since the Jedi were at their true posts. Often she wonders what the true toll of this war will be once the dust has cleared.__

__Everything has changed, and yet she still sees infinite possibilities laid out in front of them. Each decision closes one door but opens countless more in its place, she knows this better than most._ _

__She pulls the mug to her chest, letting the warmth leech its way into her palms as she centers herself in the moment._ _

__The knock at her door is utterly familiar, as is the accompanying face, not having waited for her to tell him to come in._ _

__Obi-Wan was a bit more ragged-looking than she had left him, hopeless under his own care as she and Anakin had been equally eager to remind him over the years._ _

__“Hello, Deepika,” he says, tired smile not quite reaching his eyes until she pushes a second mug towards him._ _

__“Obi-Wan,” she greets in turn, the corners of her eyes crinkling is just about the only sign she had aged at all. “It’s good to see you again. How is our Padawan?”_ _

__“ _My _Padawan is... troubled,” he sighs, pushing back on her claim with no heat behind it. “The war has drained us all. He could do with a good talking to.”___ _

____Depa laughs, bright and short “Between him and Caleb I might have a full schedule for the next few days.”_ _ _ _

____Obi-Wan took his seat beside her, leaving them shoulder to shoulder. It was years of familiarity that they had carefully built into something more. They had carved places in each other’s lives like water on stone, persistence over time._ _ _ _

____“He always did take better to your attempts to get things out of him,” Obi-Wan mused, taking a long sip of his tea._ _ _ _

____“You think too little of yourself, Obi-Wan, it isn’t becoming.” That was Depa, one part tenacious and two parts kind, ever the shining example of what a Jedi should be._ _ _ _

____Obi-Wan is silent for a moment. “Tell me how you’ve been, Depa.” There is plenty of time for troubled Padawans and unruly sons. In the midst of the war, they must take these moments for themselves, lest they lose their way._ _ _ _

____Jedi are taught to stand on their own, yes, but that does not exclude their capacity for compassion, for relations with others. As Depa launches into her tales Obi-Wan cannot help but admire her example._ _ _ _

____She examines him curiously, “What are you thinking?”_ _ _ _

____“That I love you, Deepika. Nothing more,” he replies. Nothing more, but nothing less either. It is not often so plainly put, but there are times when there is no other way._ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://diasporawar.tumblr.com/post/631376334345650176/jedi-are-taught-to-stand-on-their-own-yes-but 
> 
> Go look at this art!


	4. In my ear- Cassian/Leia

Cassian scoops Isidora off the ground unceremoniously, not minding the way she goes completely limp in protest. “Come on mija, before your Mamí finds us and asks why someone isn’t in bed.”

Isidora huffs, looking far too much like his sister had at her age. “Bed is boring and Anza always snores,” she said with a pout. 

Cassian schools his expression, a five-year-old’s woes are to be taken _very seriously _after all. If you had told him in his youth that he would be using his mask not to extract information, but to calm his youngest daughter he would never have believed it. “Does she now?” He asks, unable to keep the amusement from his voice. “What if I tell you one more story? But you have to go to bed right after or mamí will be upset with both of us." he compromised__

__Isidora considered it seriously, “A story about grandpa,” she declares_ _

__Cassian can’t help but smile, out of everything, he hopes his children will never lose sight of where they come from. A rich legacy on both sides. He is grateful that the firsthand experience of these most difficult moments is out of their realm of consciousness, but instilling those values is something he prides himself on._ _

__Getting Dora ready for bed is a much easier task now that she has a goal in mind. Not ten minutes later she is in bed, eager eyes on him._ _

__Esperanza is, as expected on the datapad, but hands it over when he holds out one hand. “Mamí warned me already.” At twelve she pretends she is too old for his stories, but never fails to lean over the side of the bed once he begins._ _

__Somewhere, along the course of the tale, Emil has slipped into the room, curling into his side as well._ _

__The weight of the two children against his chest, steady breaths as both slip into sleep over the course of his story steadies his own heart and he presses a kiss to their foreheads one after the other._ _

__He continues the story, a truly epic tale from lifetimes ago, both for the conclusion and for Anza’s benefit as she listens with wide eyes. It is not the first time she has heard it, but she listens as if it is._ _

__He feels sleep begin to pull at his own senses. He should likely get up, but the temptation to give in to the moment is high. The lights go out and “Goodnight, Papá,” is the last thing he hears before sleep truly takes hold._ _

__Next thing he knows, Leia leans over and kisses him on the cheek, “I love you, even if you let them get away with far too much,” she whispers in his ear._ _

__Extricating himself from the bed is a difficult task and Leia’s soft laughter elicits a heatless glare. It is a moment where Cassian is truly happy in a way that he could never have explained to himself lifetimes ago._ _


	5. In the middle of a storm- Finn/Rey

Finn heard the hiss of the shutting doors just in time. The rain coming down shook the entire structure and the booming thunder was no help. He couldn’t see the outdoors, but he was certain that the skies were streaked with magnificent purples. 

It was calming, the rhythmic sounds of nature a reminder that worlds moved on their own, not waiting on anyone’s say. 

Heading back into the main hold of the ship he wasn’t surprised to see Rey curled over a control panel. “Rey?” he asks softly, approaching her carefully. She got like this at times, hyper-focused on the guts of the ship in a way Finn curled his nose at. 

“The deflector shields are down until I can get outside to look at them, and she could use some touch ups when we get back,” Rey replied, turning to look at him after closing the panel. 

“It won’t be tonight, it’s coming down hard out there,” he said, gesturing to the back wall. 

They always seemed to get into these situations, though they hadn’t been traveling alone long, Finn was becoming all too familiar with the split second decisions between life and death. 

Still, he has felt more himself than he can ever recall in these months, watching the stars streak by from the cockpit of the Falcon. There is a history deep in the gears of the ship, and Finn feels a pull to it, to this legacy that he has claimed a part of. 

Leaving Luke and Leia to reconnect and lead from base, he and Rey had been given the blessing, no, the encouragement to forge their own way. 

Rey nods, glancing to the cockpit just as purple breaks through the darkness. “Did you eat today?” she asks, clearly uncomfortable, though Finn can’t yet put his finger on why. 

When Rey tensed at the next crack of thunder, it became clear. “I didn’t, but you have to wash up,” he said pointedly. 

“It was one time!” she exclaims, the tension leaving now that the focus has shifted to defending her honor. 

“It wasn’t, and one time of trying to eat with _engine grease _on your hands should be more than enough,” he teased. It was in jest, even if he still shuddered at the memory.__

__Rey glared in place of a response, but made her way to the ‘fresher all the same. While she is gone, Finn sorts out their dinner. Though Rey would eagerly do it, it is one of the tasks his stomach reminds him he shouldn’t leave to her if at all possible._ _

__He can sense her if he reaches out the way he was taught, they have been each other’s anchors in these wild turns, and feeling her is almost as natural as reaching into himself._ _

__He is still lost in thought, humming a Yavinese tune Poe had introduced him to when Rey returns. “I love you,” she says simply before pulling him back to the table. Together, they are home._ _


	6. Mumbled into her scarf- Jyn/Cassian

Cassian seemed just about ready to tear his hair out, and with his patience that was quite the statement. “Why can’t you let me handle things?” he asked. She hated the way his voice pitched up, but watched as he rifled through the ship’s medkit. 

The rhythm of the ship moving through hyperspace gave him ample room to examine the injury she had tried to conceal. 

“Because I love you,” Jyn muttered into her scarf, almost too low to be caught. Were he not accustomed to straining to hear, he wouldn’t have. She attempts to cover it with a hiss as Cassian pulls her arm towards him, but once out in the air, there is no taking it back. Though it isn’t the first time they’ve said this, it holds a different weight when Jyn has used this to place herself in the path of Imperial blasters. 

For a moment, both of them are frozen, the case of bacta gel slipping through Cassian’s fingers. As if he hadn’t heard her, he continues, spreading the gel over the burn. Slowly, the pain begins to fade, though she’ll need to see a medic on their return. 

Cassian releases her arm once he’s wrapped it, the silence that is usually so comfortable between them has grown restrictive. She can see him working through his thoughts. This, of all things, has been an adjustment. Learning to give him the space needed to formulate his response. 

“You love me, then _trust _me,” he says, the words hanging heavy in the air. Jyn almost interrupts to affirm, tell him that this shouldn’t be a question. “We make plans for a reason, I need to know you’re following.”__

__Jyn wants to scream, rage, he doesn’t know what he’s asking. Except, he does, if she knows Cassian, and she truly believes that she does, he’d calculated every aspect of this request long before facing her with it._ _

__Jyn knows Cassian. Knows the way he’d rather take a blaster bolt than dress one. Knows he’d take all of this on himself if he could. She’s heard the way he agonizes over every decision in the dead of night._ _

__Still, she cannot allow him to take them for her. “You said we were partners,” she reminds him. “We make plans, I’ll follow, but I’m not leaving you where I don’t have to.”_ _

__Cassian goes through a series of emotions in seconds, Jyn can’t place them all. The one he settles on, the confusion in his eyes breaks her heart._ _

__She takes his hand in her uninjured one. “I take my chances until there aren’t any left. I’m not leaving you until my chances are up, I swear that.”_ _

__Cassian looks as if he wants to argue, but nods. “Lay down. That’s an order,” he says lightly before heading back into the cockpit to check on their trajectory._ _

__“Yes, Captain,” she says with a grin. Her arm is throbbing steadily, and there are conversations to be had, but they are alive._ _


	7. With a shuddering gasp- Cassian/Leia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter includes major character death!

He sees her go down in slow motion, a three-act play unraveling in mere seconds. 

First, the speeder pushes against the constraints of its metalwork, racing across the Endor forest. 

The stormtroopers surround them, bright red blaster-fire scorching the air, Cassian can tell the moment she’ll be hit before it happens. 

Finally, she loses control as it makes contact, spiraling with a deafening crash. Cassian can’t stand to watch. Even worse, he cannot look away. 

The remaining troopers are shot down before he can process the movement of his limbs, and he is shouting orders that he cannot hear. 

Leia’s eyes are glassy by the time he makes it to her side. “Cassian,” she rasps, and it takes everything he has to keep his eyes on her. To hold her hands and not look away. It is a quick assessment, though one of the most difficult of his life. “Stay,” she asks, sounding simultaneously far too small and yet as commanding. 

“I’m right here, princesa. I’m not going anywhere.” He could choke on this feeling and still not have another place he’d rather be. 

Leia nods minutely, the pain overtaking her face before something far more terrifying replaces it. _Acceptance _.__

__“I love you,” Leia gasps, the words clearly becoming more and more difficult to form. “You have to-”_ _

__And there are a million ways that sentence could be filled in, each more devastating than the last. “I will,” he promises. For her, for this movement, Cassian will move galaxies._ _

__Grief has been a familiar companion, he knows the way they slot together, and the way he can move even as it clings heavily to his form._ _

__Cassian presses his lips to her forehead, counting the breaths that grow more shallow by the second. “I love you, princesa,” he murmurs, keeping up a litany of reassurances until his throat is raw with the blood running thick from where each word had cut._ _

__He feels her hands go limp in his and finally pulls back. This, some might say, is balance. Her fire burning too bright to last. They have both run against the odds, this was one too many times._ _

__There is no time to collapse, to think of what he’ll do next. His blaster has hardly cooled off when he is forced to stand on shaky legs._ _

__He cradles her in his arms, no longer worried about causing pain. She is not the first person he has held through their final moments, and maybe this is his lot in life, if he lives through this day she very well may not be his last._ _

__She is light, far too light for the weight she has had on his world. Laying her out of sight signifies his return into the fray. This, he thinks, is the end of an era. If Skywalker doesn’t kill the emperor then Cassian will do so himself, Force be damned._ _

__Rebellions are built on hope, and Cassian’s pushes him through, until all his chances are spent._ _


	8. An interruption- Cassian/Leia

Cassian lay a hand on her cheek, warm and soft, it was a direct contrast to the world he would shortly be entering. They stay like that for a moment and the emotion threatens to choke him.

He knows the comparable paradise they’ve found can’t last, but the longer he’s here the easier it becomes to fool himself into thinking he can keep it. 

The easier it would be breaking his own heart. 

Personally, Leia wasn’t known for patience, much preferring to act on the information she had, to push, though she’d learned to differentiate between the times when this was the best path forward. 

She shows that now, with her unending questions. “Cassian, where are you now?” Leia asks lightly, pressing a kiss to his palm as she pulls it away from her cheek. 

“With you,” he replies without fail. No matter how deep in his mind, part of him would always remain with her. 

Leia nods, pensive, “Then stay with me,” she says. As if it were that simple, as if either one of them had ever had that choice. With her, it might be. They might make it so. 

It is a tempting proposition, but a terrifying one all the same. How does a man who hasn’t known home in lifetimes make one? He isn’t the same person he was when he left home for the first time. He isn’t even the same person he was when he first met her. 

Then again, perhaps she isn’t the same person she was then either. No, the princess is long gone, only dusted off when need be. They’ve both grown, twisted and shifted with the tides. Now, they slot together in achingly familiar ways.

The man he was a few years ago would have recoiled at the idea of it all. The man he is now isn’t so sure. The man he is now is becoming familiar with the sounds of a bustling market, the sight of sunsets that mean nothing more, and nothing less than the passage of time. 

Leia knows what she’s asking and if anything he loves her all the more for it. “What would we do?” It’s a game of sorts, asking what they might do if their paths were not so clearly defined. 

Leia’s answering smile is worth every risk he’s taken to get this moment. “We would go to the market every week. You would teach me how you make the dish you made last night, even if it takes time,” she begins. 

And the thing is, he can almost imagine it, as absurd as it is. He can see himself at her side, even when the war doesn’t necessitate it. He can almost imagine a world in which he is allowed this. 

Her voice washes over him, so overwhelming that he is fit to burst if he doesn’t voice it. “I love you, Leia,” he interrupts. 

And he finds his home in the look in her eyes when she says “I know,”


	9. In the early morning light- Luke & Leia

The connection had been immediate, long before the name _Skywalker _had been shared. There is a lightness that he only feels in her presence. The whispers of Jedi and Princess fade away.__

__It is easier to remember that they are young, so young. The Force binds them, even if Leia does not admit to it as easily. It surrounds her, and she wields it naturally as he pushes her._ _

__The lightsaber fits in her hand as easily as the blaster she carries at all times. In a better world he would not be training her, leading her through a world he barely knows himself._ _

__Wartime habits do not die easily, and yet hearing her speak of grand ideals and a vision for the future is something Luke might not have imagined during those times. Leia is a planner, her head firmly on her shoulder, yet she is surrounded by an aura of hope. Hope that had kept a Rebellion alive when it had most needed her._ _

__It would be easy to get lost in who she presents, but when he looks at her he also sees the woman time has worn down. He wonders if this is what Ben had meant when he said they now carried the weight of thousands._ _

__The sun is beginning to creep over the hills when Leia shakes him from his musings, “Are you even listening, Luke?”_ _

__He smiles sheepishly, unable to lie to her. “Got lost a bit there, but I’m listening now.”_ _

__“So what was on your mind then?” she asks, propping herself up on her elbows as she lay across the grass looking at him curiously. It is one of the things he’s always loved about her. She’s never satisfied as long as she doesn’t know something._ _

__Luke hums in acknowledgment, “How far we’ve come I guess?” Luke doesn’t delude himself, he knows she’d thought him naive when they first met, unused to the expectations that came with a station._ _

__He’d earned respect in his own right, he isn’t the wide-eyed boy he’d been on Tatooine._ _

__Leia nods, letting the silence sit for a moment. “Do you think about it sometimes? Who you might have been otherwise I mean.”_ _

__It isn’t a train of thought Luke enjoys entertaining, though he can’t claim otherwise. Each decision, each moment had shut doors and opened infinitely more futures. “I don’t think it’s all that worth it, no? We’re here now, and I love who you’ve become, Leia.”_ _

__She offers him a genuine smile for his efforts, one that seems to be creeping up more and more often since they had left the war behind. There were other stresses in this life, and the war had left its scars, but there is a lightness about them now. “Love you too, even if you wake up at ridiculously early hours.”_ _

__“A Jedi must be able to work at any hour,” he says, falsely serious. He supposes he’s earned the handful of grass she throws in his face._ _


	10. Attempting to comfort- Cassian/Leia

Leia says his name like he is _salvation _, a prayer dripping thick from her lips and he does not know what to do with it. Instead, he wraps himself around her as if doing so might protect her from the worlds around them.__

__Leia’s shoulders shake, weighted down with the expectations of worlds that no longer existed. Her sobs are silent, even as his shirt is wet with tears that had waited too long._ _

__Her loss is palpable, her people lost in a graveyard that will forever hang in empty space._ _

__It seems like lifetimes pass from the moment she stepped onto the ship until she speaks to him at all._ _

__Leia sits up a bit, wiping the remaining tears from her face. She is still leaning on him as if supporting her own weight is unthinkable for now. “Sorry, sorry, I should be-”_ _

__Cassian squeezes her tighter “You should nothing,” he says firmly. “Not with me.” There were too many pretenses already between them to add this. She shouldn’t have apologized for anything at all. Not when he should have been there for her so much sooner._ _

__Privately, Cassian wanted to be the anchor when she couldn’t find herself. It was what she had offered him, someone who worked past all of the covers and falsehoods. On the nights he didn’t feel quite real, even to himself, he heard her words ringing in his ears._ _

__Leia is quiet for a long while, almost long enough for him to become concerned. “It doesn’t feel real,” she whispers. It is in these moments, when she is most vulnerable that she seems to fit her age._ _

__Though, Cassian thinks as he presses a kiss to her hairline, their youth shouldn’t be marked by this depth of grief. “I know, Lei,” he murmurs. It is all he can say when nothing will change the outcome._ _

__He had gotten the plans of Scarif, and yet she had still paid the price. All of Alderaan gone, so that others may live. It seems almost too high a price to pay._ _

__Her eyes close once more and he can only imagine the burst of light painted across her eyelids. A cloud that made up every citizen bursting into existence._ _

__“They should be here, Cass,” she says, almost pleading. As if a bargain with the unfeeling universe would gain her anything. He knows this dance intimately, had done it more than once._ _

__“I know,” he repeats. He almost doesn’t catch the hitch in her voice, but the way she leans into him is crystal clear._ _

__It is the least he can do to let her exhaust this here before she must put on the face of a leader once more. “I love you, Leia,” he whispers into her hair. It is something saved for these moments, quiet linking them both. These times when nothing else will suffice._ _

__This is what he can offer her: a pair of arms to hold her in the beats between their duty._ _


	11. While in bed- Finn/Rey

They would never be those children again, but sometimes that was a good thing. He would never again sit with armor that pinched, repurposed from someone. He didn’t care to think about what had happened to them. He knew who he was now, and he wouldn’t trade that for the world. An integral place in something much larger. 

She would never be the scavenger, waiting on a family that would never return. She had carved a space for herself, a new family that had forged their way through a war into a new era. She wasn’t quite certain in her role, but for once she had time to figure it out. 

Still, they carried the scars from each day spent in those lives. Long nights spent awake as the moments played out again and again in their minds. When there was nothing else, they had each other to share the weight. 

Sitting in their bed now, Rey wondered how he slept so soundly. She enjoyed watching him at ease, it was something she hadn’t been sure would ever occur during the war. It seemed lightyears away even as they began to rebuild. 

Finn had taken to leadership as naturally as he reached out for the Force. In a way, she envied the way he connected with others. If she didn’t know him so intimately she would have thought he had never been affected.

It is these quiet moments between the two of them that she treasures. When the calm settles over them. These moments where she looks at him and truly _sees_

__While Rey had lost herself in thought, Finn had turned over, looking up at her with a soft smile. “I can see the gears turning, what’re you thinking of so early?” he hums, pushing himself up at her side._ _

__“You and how you’re going to be late for your meeting with Leia,” she says matter of factly. In reality, especially with his efficiency there’s no way he’ll be late and he knows it._ _

__Finn hums in acknowledgement “Well she won’t have that, will she now?”_ _

__Rey lays her head on his shoulder, not quite ready to let him go. “You can tell her it was for a good reason.”_ _

__Finn shifts to wrap his arm around her waist. “And what would that be?” he asks, clearly not too keen on getting up either as he presses a row of kisses to her shoulder._ _

__“Laying here with me.”_ _

__Finn laughs, and it’s a sound she’d do anything to keep. “For some reason I don’t think she’d take too well to that. ‘Sorry, Leia, I couldn’t make it because I had to lay in bed’” he says in a mock-serious voice._ _

__She’s overwhelmed by how much she loves him sometimes, in the oddest moments. “Well, I love you.”_ _

__Finn smiles, as he’s never failed to do when she reminds him of it. “I love you too, but I’m not missing that meeting”._ _

__Rey groans overdramatically “It was worth a try.”_ _


	12. In place of more- Bodhi/Cassian

Bodhi doesn’t look up from the camera and datapad he’s been tinkering with, even as Cassian speaks, eyes focused on his task. The familiar noise made for a soothing background, as odd as that sounds. 

With others, he might have thought they weren’t paying attention, but this was simply how Bodhi worked. They all had their quirks, who was he to judge? 

Cassian keeps talking as he settles into the room, nothing overly important, but it’s good to have someone that would listen to the inane details at times. It is easy to feel at ease with him, something that his mind pushes back against sometimes. 

He falls silent, appreciative of the value of comfortable silence. Sometimes the weight of words was too much. He had been asked to come up with them constantly, reports, meetings, spinning entire lives with a silver tongue. When the pressure was off, sometimes there was nothing left.

He brings his chair to the other side of the desk, examining the lines of Bodhi’s body, tension, and calm working into one. It is nothing like their first meeting, frantic and lost. Nothing has quite matched that, even if that doesn’t mean there hadn’t been a fair share of close calls and almosts. 

Bodhi’s voice would go over his head if it weren’t for the look on his face as he pushes the datapad away. “You’re thinking too hard again,” he says, toeing the thin line between directness and concern. They all thought too much nowadays, and sometimes you didn’t have to get to the root of it. 

“Workplace hazard, you know?” he jokes. There is a different language in the give and take between two people, something beautiful that can only be communicated wordlessly. With a fluency in _Bodhi _that he hadn’t expected, Cassian lays a hand on Bodhi’s arm to let him know he is truly alright.__

__He isn’t always. Then again, Bodhi isn’t either. Before, it seemed the bad nights would far outnumber the good. Even after the war was truly over, it had meant an adjustment to a life that neither of them had known._ _

__Despite that, Cassian has found that he’s... alright now. Coping. Learning who he is when he has more choices to make. The two of them have been learning to take their slice of the galaxy and what they could do with it._ _

__The fond eye-roll his comment gains him elicits a smile of his own. “You know that wasn’t what I meant.”_ _

__He does. He’s been getting better about sharing his thoughts, and he has reason to now. He wants to thank Bodhi for being there, for never asking for more than he can give, and for the bravery he had never ceased to display._ _

__He doesn’t say that. “I love you,” comes out instead, and maybe that can encompass all the words Cassian never finds._ _

__The way Bodhi flips their arms to interlace their fingers and the responding smile makes him think he might be right._ _


	13. When you are long dead- Cassian/Leia

Cassian knows he was named for the stars above a Festian winter. He can still hear what he thinks is his father’s voice as he held Cassian’s hand so that they could both trace the shape of the constellation. 

One of the few memories he has of his father that he still has, he’d kept the holo from that night safe over decades and a war that had seemed impossible. He pulls it out now, careful as always. 

His mother hadn’t caught their faces, only an outline of the three, Jerónimo’s hand around Cassian’s smaller one as they traced the stars, a tiny mass of curls that could only be his sister crashing into his right side. If he closes his eyes he can almost imagine the air that night.

He had been loved, and he had loved in turn. In a way, he still did, pinning hope on the ideals of a man he hadn’t truly known. 

Packing hadn’t been the problem, maker knows Cassian had packed too many times to get emotional every time he did. No, it was the finality of it. Of packing his life in the Rebellion away, and committing to a new one.

This one would hopefully last. 

He startles as the door opens. Cassian Andor leaving a door unlocked, now there was a show of trust. Even then, he would recognize those footsteps anywhere. 

The holoprojector would be easy to shut off before she could see, but he isn’t invested in hiding this.

“You will never believe-” Leia begins, frustration filling her tone. As she enters the room she lets out a soft “Oh,” as her face visibly softens. 

She wraps an arm around his waist, looking the flickering image over carefully. “I haven’t seen this one yet,” she whispers. They’ve long since discussed bits and pieces of their pasts, the ones that had come out naturally over the years. 

A night spent among the stars wasn’t something that came out in the middle of a war. 

Cassian shakes his head, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “No, this one’s a bit older than the ones I’ve shown you. I think I’m around four here.” 

Cassian pauses for a moment, taking a moment to simply breathe. Leia doesn’t seem interested in hurrying him. “He loved the stars,” he begins, trusting she’ll know who he means. “My name even came from a constellation over Fest, I don’t remember the story, but I know it was his idea. Mamá must’ve named Lucía then.”

He had never asked, yet another thing he would never know. What he did know was that his mother had been awake for every sunrise as long as she had been alive. _Mijo, mientras salga el sol, tenemos esperanza,” _she would say. The significance of her name hadn’t failed to escape him.__

__As Leia trained a soft smile on him, he knew she had been right. The sun was rising yet again, and his new hope was right here._ _


	14. With another chance - Leia/Cassian/Jyn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While I think about what you'll think about with everything I write, this one especially @cassandor 💜

A lesser person might have broken under the weight of such grief. Leia Organa does not have such a chance. There are arrangements to be made, troops to encourage, a Rebellion to run. 

The relief she felt upon learning that Cassian had survived gives her enough hope to continue. She thinks of his convictions on the long nights spent poring over the strategy table. 

By now it must be clear to all that if she is not to be found in the war room or her quarters the medbay is the next bet. She is not blind to the looks she has been given for remaining at Cassian’s bedside. 

Day after day she is joined by Jyn Erso. Leia still wants to decipher her in both a professional and a personal sense. She appreciates Jyn for her lack of questions, and doubly so for the fact that she often arrives with dinner. 

Tonight though, it is well past visiting hours, and while errant newly minted Rebellion members might have to follow the regulations, princesses were free from such rules. Leia is above most regulations if not truly for her station, then because everyone seems to be walking on thin ice. 

It makes her want to scream. A prison of her own making, she’d even pushed Han away with an impressive argument a few days prior. 

He will not remember any of this. Maybe that’s what gives her the space to say what she’d struggled with to his face. She rests her forehead against his unmoving hand, a deep breath before murmuring “I love you,” against his knuckles. 

Leia had only meant to close her eyes a moment, but she is woken by familiar voices. Clearly, Jyn wins the argument as she is the only one who slips into the room. 

Jyn slides into the seat beside her, pressing a steaming mug of caf into her free hand. “Sticking my neck out for you, Princess,” she grumbles. 

Instead of a response, Leia takes a long sip of the caf, perfectly sweet just as she likes it. When she looks up she expects to see Jyn watching over Cassian as she’s come to expect, but instead she’s got the force of that gaze on her. 

Leia’s hand is entangled with Cassian’s, and she hasn’t made any moves to change. Jyn looks over them for a moment before coming to a decision Leia wished she were privy to. 

The chair pulled up is closer than necessary and Leia has a million questions. “Why?” is the only one that escapes her.

Jyn shrugs “Because I know what you’re doing. And _someone’s _gotta work past it. Besides, anyone that can put Solo in his place like that is alright in my book.”__

__Jyn has made her decisions abundantly clear in an almost enviable way. Leia barely knew which way was up these days. Being at Cassian’s side had felt natural, and as much as she’d deny it, she’d grown used to having Jyn at hers._ _


	15. on the edge of a cliff- Cassian/Leia

He’s been wandering the base for an hour now, rolling Mon Mothma’s words over in his mind over and over again. The argument was familiar by now, tired. He’s tired. He doesn’t know how long he’s been tired. 

There is a loud crash around the corner, and he stifles a groan. There is a slight pause as he approaches, and the next thing he hears is a very familiar voice. The annoyance fades away as quickly as it had come on. 

“Mother of all kriffing _sith-spit! _” Comes out, and the mental image of Leia matched with those words is almost enough to put him over the edge.__

__The hydrospanner at her feet completes the picture, and he has to bite his lip to keep from laughing. He would certainly earn himself her infamous glare if he did. “Do you need some help here?” he asks, unable to keep amusement from bleeding into his voice._ _

__Leia spins on him in a move that would be threatening on anybody else, though she deflates upon truly taking in who it is. “I’ve got it covered,” she says indignantly._ _

__She has bags under her eyes that speak of long nights spent poring over strategies and maps. He softens at it in a way he hadn’t expected. “Let me help you, Lei?”_ _

__“I can’t get this screw,” she grumbles. She hands him the hydrospanner, quickly showing him what she had been working on. It is immediately clear why she had been having trouble, though it wasn’t something that most people would notice._ _

__This is something that he appreciates about her, she had never been content to lead from a pedestal. Too often she leaned to the other extreme, stretching herself too thin._ _

__He makes quick work of the screw, and when he turns around Leia is watching him with a gleam in her eyes. “There,” he murmurs, “All done.”_ _

__“I love you, I—” she cuts herself off, still looking at him with the dark eyes that had captivated him from the beginning._ _

__Heavy silence hangs in the air for a beat, thick but not restrictive. Cassian couldn’t say who moves in first, but before he knows it Leia’s hands slide up his chest, twisting in his shirt to pull him tight against her. Instinctively, his fall to her waist._ _

__Leia isn’t routine. Isn’t comfortable, safe, easy, or anything advisable. Leia is hope, and that is never a safe choice. Cynics called hope naive. Cassian knew that hope meant there was always more to lose._ _

__Kissing her is like standing at a precipice, there is always the risk of falling, but the clarity that comes with it makes the risk worth everything._ _

__He pulls away just far enough to rest his forehead against hers. This is a breath of fresh air in the midst of a war. It cannot be anything more. They do not voice any of it, standing there breathing with the moment instead._ _

__Hope makes home in the space where their breaths intermingle._ _


	16. As a greeting -Shara/Kes

Shara is mesmerizing. She has the type of energy that made everyone around her want to stay. It is cliche to say she lights up a room when she enters, but Kes isn’t above cliche, especially not when it concerns his wife. 

Shara has some of the arrogance typical of a fighter-pilot, but in a way, that was what was necessary to have confidence enough to speed between TIEs and evade destroyers. They had to run on confidence and faith more than fuel. He prays it had been enough to keep her alive now as it had in wartime. 

She pulls people into her orbit and Kes is no different. He still remembers the day he first saw her in her full glory. He had known from the moment she had trained dark eyes on him that he had to get to know her. 

It hadn’t taken him long to fall in love with her from there.

Shara had been a bit more reticent, at least to his knowledge, but once she set her mind on something she approached it with the same confidence she had at the controls of her A-wing. 

That was to say, without abandon or second glances. 

Kes made a promise years ago, that he would never live to regret a moment shared. He had never been one to ask Shara to slow down, reaching breakneck speed in his own way. They fit in that way, the ebb and flow of the times making an inescapable net of what they could no longer handle. 

He’d told her he loved her before she left, but waits for her to come back to reply. Now, he was counting down the moments until the familiar sound of her landing filled the atmosphere once more. For once, he doesn’t have Poe attached to his leg waiting for her to return home as well.

A community had been built on the graves of those they’d lost, and trusting them with his son had come surprisingly easy. Besides, Poe was especially taken with little Esperanza. 

When Shara finally steps off the ship it’s as if he can truly breathe again. He isn’t as young as he’d once been, but that doesn’t stop him from rushing forward to pull her into an embrace. 

She looks tired, but laughs, but wraps her arms around him as well, spectators be damned. “Kes? Yo también te amo,” she whispers, as if it were a secret.

He presses a gentle kiss to her lips “Let’s go home, Shara Bey,” he says, disentangling himself from her, though he does slot their hands together.

Shara lets him lead the way, quieter than usual. Later there will be time for questions, to map every bit of her for injury, and to catch each other up on everything that’s been missed in the weeks she’s been gone. 

Now, he is bringing his wife home, and he can feel her smile tucked against his neck as they race by on his bike.


	17. Over and over again-Depa/Obi

The knock on her door is expected, and at the same time, not fully welcome. Depa hasn{t done anything less than face what plagues her, even if that means the man whose actions she cannot conceive.

The door opens to Obi Wan holding his arms open, and it would be far too easy to sidestep him after all this time, to close the door without speaking a word. She isn’t the same woman who would have done that. 

Wrapping her arms around him, Depa feels the weight of so many lives drop from her shoulders. He pulls her close, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head. “I love you Deepika,” he murmurs over and over as if by saying it again he might drive the point home. 

She had been angry with him, a difficult thing to reconcile taking comfort from the man while she is, but it is secondary to the relief that leaves her knees weak. “I thought you were _dead _,” she hisses, “We all did.” She’d seen him of course, with the Council, but this was different.__

__Obi Wan stiffens around her, but it is a necessary expression “I wish it hadn’t been so, my dear. I do.”_ _

__Depa pulls back and looks him over for a moment. He’s lost weight and the look of contrition hasn’t failed to get to her, loathe as she is to admit it. “You know as well as I do that there was more to it.”_ _

__He swallows thickly, the memory of her own disappearance clear in both of their minds. Perhaps if he’d had more time to think things through he would have found a better way, but as it stood the choices had been made._ _

__Her Master would say time and time again that it was no use dwelling on the past, only bettering oneself in light of it._ _

__The more of the past she discovered, both hers and others, the more that lesson proved to be like most things. Easy to understand in the abstract, but far more difficult to put into practice._ _

__“It wasn’t-” Excuses, again. “No, you’re right. Even I can admit when I am wrong.”_ _

__It is a welcome surprise, especially when being angry with him isn’t worth the effort. Even if she would be well within her rights to be so. “Now where might you have learned that?” she asks, a sly grin crossing her face._ _

__With that, things are forgiven, though far from forgotten. Still, in the midst of a war, it is harder to justify holding tight to resentment rather than loved ones._ _

__Finally, Obi Wan offers her the smile she’d been aiming for, even with the jab at his own Master she can’t help. He wouldn’t admit as much, but he knows she’s right. “The Room of a Thousand Fountains,” he retorts._ _

__Depa raises an eyebrow, “Careful, Obi Wan, you may still have some reflecting to do there. I’m certain you haven’t seen all thousand fountains enough recently.”_ _


End file.
